Lines In The Snow
Skiing and riding at the resorts on a weekend holiday powder day is all about lines. There are the lines you choose to take down a favorite run on a powder day. Check out my line, bro. That’s the good kind of line. Sometimes it’s the lift line you have to wait in at the resort to get to your favorite run on a powder day. Buzzkill. Sometimes it’s the line of people in the boot pack trail as you attempt to hike away from the other bad types of lines and seek your own good sort of line in the side country. There is the line of cars stopped at the bottom of Little Cottonwood Canyon waiting for it to open, all so you can make your way to all the other aforementioned lines. Being someone who is intrigued and amused by the words people sometimes choose to express themselves, I often find humor in these situations. Here are just a few lines that stuck with me after the last storm cycle:
"Excuse me, I'm not trying to cut you, I just need to get up there with my friend." Person in lift line at PCMR, waiting for Crescent Lift to open.
“Sort of like driving past a State Trooper on the freeway. You probably shouldn’t do it, but it feels kind of of good.” Overheard while passing ski patrollers in the boot pack trail on the way out to West Face in Jupiter.
“They must get paid by the hour, not the hike.” Same person.
“I wonder if they are carrying bombs.” Different person, same hike.
“Damn all you telemarkers and AT skiers with your walk-mode boots!” Frustrated guy in alpine boots who was not walking very fast, same hike.
“I thought it was a waste, but that’s the best money I ever spent.” Overheard from a skier going through FastTracks line at PCMR, and going from the back of the line to the front of the line in the beep of a turnstile.
“You mean you DON’T have to lean way back in the powder?” Random guy on Jupiter lift who was asking me all about my Rossignol S7s.
“You don’t lean back, you lean forward.” Me.
“Oh. I think I need new skis.” Same guy who asked me about my skis.
“Hey, are you leaving already? Why, is it no good?” Person in car in PCMR parking lot, who was just getting to the mountain at 1pm on a powder day.
“Can I have your spot?” Same person.
What's the funniest thing you have ever heard in a lift line? Come on, post it in the comments. Unless it's dirty. Then it won't get approved.